:: Fattabiouni - Layanan Terhadap Isteri Cara Rasulullah S.A.W ::

Salam peeps!

I love love love this Fattabiouni guy.. 

Rasulullah SAW ditanyakan mengenai hal isteri ke atas seorang suami. Baginda SAW menjawab:

“Hendaklah kemu memberinya makan apabila kamu makan, memberinya pakaian apabila kamu berpakaian atau kamu beroleh penghasilan, dan janganlah kamu memukul muka (isteri), jangan memburuk-burukkannya dan jangan memisahkan diri dari mereka kecuali di dalam rumah.”

(Hadits riwayat Abu Daud)

Hadits tersebut melarang memukul isteri pada muka kerana muka merupakan anggota yang penting dan zahir dilihat. Begitu juga dilarang suami mengeluarkan perkataan tidak baik kepada isteri, tidak mengeji serta memaki isteri. Seandainya isteri nusyuz suami janganlah berpindah ke rumah lain (meninggalkan isteri), kerana yang dimaksudkan bagi isteri yang nusyuz adalah dipisahkan tempat tidurnya iaitu tidak tidur bersama-sama.

Memudaratkan isteri secara fizikal seperti menampar, memukul, menyepak isteri adalah dilarang kerana perbuatan seumpama ini amat jauh dari konsep pergaulan baik suami isteri sebagaimana yang dituntut syara‘.

Jikapun isteri melakukan kesalahan, suami diperintahkan untuk menasihati isteri kerana mungkin dengan nasihatnya isteri akan sedar akan kesalahan yang dilakukan. Menasihati isteri kerana kesalahan yang dilakukannya ada disebutkan dalam perkara isteri nusyuz. Sunat seorang suami menasihati isterinya yang nusyuz dan memujuk isteri dengan cara mengambil hati, umpamanya dengan memberikan sesuatu. Suami dibenarkan memukul isteri yang nusyuz hanya setelah nusyuz isteri jelas berterusan (setelah suami menasihati dan memisahkan tempat tidurnya).

Cara memukul yang dibenarkan oleh syara‘ pula ialah pukulan yang tidak mendatangkan mudharat kepada isteri, iaitu tidak boleh memukul isteri dengan pukulan keras, tidak boleh memukul pada muka atau pada anggota-anggota isteri yang mudah cedera. Tujuan pukulan tersebut adalah bagi maslahah suami sendiri iaitu supaya isteri kembali taat semula kepadanya. Oleh yang demikian, adalah lebih baik jika suami tidak memukul isteri jika dirasakan tidak perlu. 

(taken from : http://www.mufti.gov.bn/irsyad/pelita/2010/bil1_bhg2-2010.pdf)

This is not something we should take lightly. This is extremely important. A husband needs to understand his responsibilities and limits towards his family, which I think is lacking in our society. Blame it on stress, or cost of living or women working, the fact of the matter is, a husband still needs to provide for his family. To quote an ustazah (I cant remember her name) she said, even if she is the richest person on earth, richer than bill gates and sultan of Brunei, the husband still need to provide for her. Needs to buy her food and clothes. If the husband buys her nasi n ikan bilis, thats her rezeki for that day. But of course, being a woman, she wouldnt be stingy.. she would contribute to the household. but thats her prerogative. She can choose to keep all her money in the bank or spend it on herself or just give it to her parents.

That is why ladies and gentlemen, I respect Arab guys. They understand and live by this rule. They are the guy and therefore they should provide. I've lived in Dubai and have had the privilege to befriend a few arabs, most of them guys. Yes, they appear rough and rude. But if you understand what they are saying to each other, you would agree will me that they are most caring among their friends and family. Most of the time, a guy would buy a house before even considering to get married, so that he can bring his wife to live in his house. Its very common to see the guy giving his future bride a house or at least a car for hantaran. I heard the news on the radio the other day, an arab guy divorced his wife a few seconds after akad because his wife insisted on working. While most of you might think this is crazy, I find it sweet. Its sweet how the husband wants the wife to stay home and let him find the money and provide for the family. 

When I say wives should stay home, I dont mean to cook and clean etc.. That was never the responsibility of the wives. Women do it because of love and because they are better at it than men. Its sad to see wives being treated like slaves nowadays. She works 8 to 5, come back home and had to cook and clean and care for the children, all because men assume that house chores are the responsibilities of the wives. After all that, fulfill her responsibility towards her husband in bed, and still we hear a lot of women being beaten by their husbands. 

tsk tsk tsk...

Semoga Allah tunjukkan jalan..

Anyway, enjoy the message of this video. Great reminder to all of us. If Rasulullah S.A.W, the most powerful guy on earth, a man of such great stature, can be loving and gentle towards his wife(s), what makes you think you are better than him by treating your wife(s) roughly? Think about it. We are only human, we need constant reminder sometimes. "...sampaikanlah walaupun satu ayat.."

Take care of each other! Tata..