:: Motherhood and Breastfeeding ::

Salam dear friends,

Being a mother is totally not what I expected. Its not just having a little person depending you for everything, not just having a precious person as a symbol of love between you and your husband.. Its a whole new different realm, which cant be explained with words. Just talking about my baby and thinking about him tugs my heart strings.. I never felt a love this pure and deep. Only now I truly understand the sacrifices and the love of my own mother. I feel like hitting my own head with a hammer for every time I refused to do what my mother asked of me, or simply acting like a spoiled brat. (Ya Allah ampunkan dosaku.. Mak, ampunkan jah..)

Anyway, I will talk more about my precious little boy whom we named Faizal Ziqri bin Muhammad Farid in my next post perhaps.

Important thing first. Breastfeeding. Ever since before I was even pregnant, I have always wanted to breastfeed my baby because I truly believe that the milk created by god is the best milk. The bonding between a mom and her baby when he's breastfeeding is priceless. Thats the time when the baby is truly connected with his mother and thats the best time for a mother to talk to her baby, read him doa or simply stare into his eyes and send him loads of love.

I am now breastfeeding my son exclusively. But it was not easy getting here. First few days after birth, my son cried a lot. I didnt know how to feed him and he was still getting used to sucking for food. (versus getting food constantly via umbilical chord, without any effort). We struggled. It was very frustrating for him and extremely painful for me. I mean physically painful. My nipple bled and I cried a lot during that time. No, it was not Postpartum depression, i was crying because of the pain. But I didnt give up. I was determined to keep on trying everything under the sun, so that my son can get the best he can get. I was not ready to deny my son of his birth right to breast milk. People say I need to pump so that the milk keep on producing.. I did that. Still my milk was too low. Then people say I should take herbal tea.. I did that and still didnt work. People told me I should eat papaya, bak choi, soy, fresh milk, anmum milk, I tried everything! Finally my sister in-law recommended a tukang urut to help me massage for milk. In a heartbeat I wanted to try. Syukur Alhamdulilah, that worked. With the help of Allah of course, my milk was flowing, and still is.. i am praying that my milk would be sufficient for him until he's 2 years old. 

To new mothers out there, I know it can get very frustrating. You dont know where to go, who to ask and what to do.. I know! trust me, I know!! The key is to relax. Find & read as much as you can on the net. Sites like http://www.babycenter.com and http://www.askdrsears.com are really helpful. Buy books, look out for flyers in clinics, gather as much information about breastfeeding as possible. If you can afford it, go see a lactation specialist. If you cant, try asking a breastfeeding mother. To me, breastfeeding mothers are the best teachers. They know what works and what not. For example, for working moms, doctors would advice you to pump your milk and ask the caretaker to feed your baby using a cup or a spoon. This is to avoid nipple confusion. To me, this doesnt work at all. My son is a hefty eater. He wont accept spoon fed milk. So i bottle feed him my expressed breast milk. Yes, at one point he was nipple confused. But after some reassurance and persistence, he accepts mine. In fact, I believe that babies actually prefer the real nipple, no matter what. 

Try deep breathing when breast feeding or pumping, think of your baby, look at his pictures, that really help the flow. I know it sounds ridiculous but it works. Keep on pumping and feeding as frequent as u can. Its ok if you only get an ounce. Keep at it. It will hurt as hell at first but u've been through labour.. so?

It is extremely important to surround yourself with positive people, those who are supportive of your decision to breastfeed. Coz trust u me, even family members are sometimes pro formula. I am blessed to have a mother who is very supportive of my decision. A father who is very protective and a husband who, like me, wants only the best for our child. There will be those who come to you and say, "anak ko ni tak cukup makan ni.. bagi je la formula" or "ko tengok anak orang tu.. gemok je.. tu la bagusnya minum susu tin.." or "ko bagi je la susu botol.. senang ko nak gi keje nanti.." or "jangan biasakan anak ko ngan susu badan.. nanti breast ko londeh.. kita pompuan kena jaga badan.." Tell them all to get lost. 

In my office, one particular colleague is very supportive of breastfeeding. He gave me support and endless encouragements. I would ask him questions and he would go back and ask his wife, and would come to work the next day with an answer. His wife, who is also a breastfeeding working mom, loaned me a book yesterday. A book I think every malaysian working mother should read. I dont know where to get it but I think the information is very useful. Apparently this book is very hard to get. (I wonder why!!!) So thank you so much Mr & Mrs Asba!

Ok so here's what I'm gonna do.. I'm gonna attach pictures of the book which I copied. Its not as pretty as the book but you can still read it. The information in it is the most important. Print these pictures out and read it and re-read it until u truly understand the content. 

I've done my part. If by publishing this post, I could persuade 1 mother to fully breastfeed her child, I would be very happy.. So good luck! Be patient and pray a lot!


p/s: Everything written here is of my own opinion and is not meant to hurt anybody. I believe that a mother knows whats best for her own child. Every child is unique so what works for me may not work for you. And most importantly, its your prerogative  if you choose not to breastfeed for whatever reason. I was not breastfed and I know I turn out great.. because I have great parents.. now thats a whole different story..

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